I stood and watched as the cart rolled through the wide double doors into Operating Room 1.It was my first day of shadowing a pediatric neurosurgeon and,我等医生进来的时候，我用脚轻拍着看不见的节拍的节奏，把戴着手套的手拧到我的后罩子后面。一个棕色短发的小男孩靠在枕头上躺着；他进来的时候，背挺直了，蓝眼睛里闪烁着光芒，环顾四周。他环顾白色的房间，紧紧抓住毯子的边缘。bepaly手机官网Glancing at each person in turn,the boy tilted his head as he passed by me.
He turned his attention to the bearded man next to him,穿着绿色的衣服，戴着面罩。
“躺下放松，“he told the boy as he motioned to the nurses on either side.“你只会觉得有点紧。”“
The boy lie back and,闭上眼睛，他几乎看起来很平静-除了他那微微颤抖的手，他皱巴巴的闭上眼睛和颤抖的下巴。The nurses placed the breathing funnel over his nose and mouth as the anesthesiologist injected the contents of his syringe into the connected bag.After a minute,I saw all of the boy's limbs slump against the bed and his head sink deeper into the pillow.
The nurses began to flurry around,停下来检查男孩的心率和在墙上监视器上显示的脉搏。当他们开展业务时，我转向旁边的那个女人。她穿着和房间里其他人一样的绿色衣服。把她的面具拉起遮住她的大部分脸，all that was visible was a pair of light blue eyes and a name tag that read"Molly."“
我们两个都转过身来，看到双门又打开了。T stride confidently inside.她是那里最矮的女人，但她有一种信心，与她作为神经外科医生的漫长职业生涯不相上下。She turned to me as the others assisted her with her gloves and body apron.
“你今天怎么样？“she asked,明亮。After I responded,她开始解释手术。All"suited up,“她站在脚凳上开始工作。I watched in morbid fascination as she turned on her cauterizing scalpel and began cutting into the boy's scalp.A small amount of blood,no more than a spoonful or two,began to trickle as she dug deeper.她定期停止切割，用毛巾擦干净。这是我从外科学来的最令人震惊的事情之一。bepaly手机官网I always considered the skull to be a precious object,a part of the body where every incision has to be made delicately and shallowly.看到这么宽的一个伤口，我就明白了人类头骨的巨大，它的治疗能力，以及在正常操作中的灵巧和几乎粗糙。
It would be remiss to ignore the atmosphere.博士。T talked throughout the whole procedure.她同时和护士交谈，技术人员和代表，并监控她的首席住院医师。
“You know how it is,“she said in passing.“What you learn in medical school,you throw away when you enter residency."虽然可能有些夸张，it still rang with a certain truth.尽管居民回答了她关于插入分流器的理论问题，bepaly手机官网he still mistook precisely where he would incise and thread the catheter tube.
而且，yet,even beyond that,what I realized as I watched Dr.T was that the atmosphere wasn't overly tense,紧张或者甚至紧张。相反，当我看到医生,nurses,住户和服务员互相交谈，当我听到背景音乐轻柔地播放时，我更充分地理解了治疗者的职责。在电影中表现出来的并不是反抗死亡的英雄主义，这也不一定是一件非常平凡的事，monotonic series of patients.相反，我看到了。T's smile.她的互动，too,showed me how much she valued collaboration in her work.And then I realized that just like any other profession,做医生就是真正热爱自己的职责。
And so as the boy was wheeled out of the operating room and the music in the room kicked up a notch in volume,我看着一群穿着绿色衣服的医生和护士。I observed their skill in deftly inserting the shunt.I observed their warm regard for each other in their conversations.But most important was what I observed when the young boy was wheeled into the operating room,45分钟前：房间里所有专业人士都有信任感，a trust that they could help him.尽管他注射针头时颤抖，he didn't fight it.看到这一信任及其在手术后的履行，我确信我渴望履行医生的治疗职责。我决定在未来与我自己的病人建立信任。Thus,当博士T shook my hand goodbye for the day's observation,I shook her hand back and said to myself,“Yes,this is what I want to do."“